23 April 2013

Meanwhile, in Congress

From The Borowitz Report, a humor column at The New Yorker:

Courageous Senators Stand Up to American People
In the halls of the United States Senate, dozens of Senators congratulated themselves today for having what one of them called “the courage and grit to stand up to the overwhelming wishes of the American people.”

“We kept hearing, again and again, that ninety per cent of the American people wanted us to vote a certain way,” said Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell (R-Kentucky). “Well, at the end of the day, we decided that we weren’t going to cave in to that kind of special-interest group.”

“It was a gut check, for sure, but we had to draw a line in the sand,” agreed Senator Lindsey Graham (R-S. Carolina). “If we had voted the way the American people wanted us to, it would have sent the message that we’re here in Washington to be nothing more than their elected representatives.” 
And in a related matter, via Tech Dirt:
In case you were wondering why so many Democrats switched sides during the most recent CISPA vote, the answer is exactly what you think it is: $$$. And lots of it. Last year's CISPA vote only managed to secure 40 Democrat supporters. This time around, the number leapt to 92.
[A] new coalition of special interests... came together to create a similar data grab bill... Pushing the bill through was $84M USD in funding from special interest backers.
$84 million is change-of-heart money, although one imagines those contributing checked and double-checked their "sponsored" representatives to make sure they were all on the same page.
Via a Reddit discussion thread.


  1. Ninety per cent is not a "special interest group"-ten percent is. Good God, do these idiots ever think?

    1. Humor column. :-)

    2. Anon, as Mel is gently pointing out, the source link is a tongue-in-cheek thrashing of Congressional behavior; it might be more obvious at the original link.

  2. They do it over and over again. Name your issue:
    Background Checks
    Taxing the wealthy
    etc. etc.

    Wealthy special interests and extremists that screech louder than everybody else, defying the will of the people. We'll never have anything close to a democracy until we cut out special interest money from our system, like the cancer it is.

  3. Just think how bravely any one those patriots would've have acted during The American Revolution! Can't ya just see ol' Mitch and Lindsey gallantly galloping on their steeds, swords drawn, right into the very heart of a Redcoat brigade!

  4. No matter which side of the gun control and privacy issues you fall on, that New Yorker dude has it nailed - these guys don't actually work for us. Funny article, though.

  5. While Borowitz is supposedly being humorous, the sad fact is that those manufactured quotes have the ring of truth to them. You really can hear these pols voicing those idiocies, and then denying their words when caught.

  6. Did anyone watch The Daily Show's trip to Australia? John Oliver interviewed politicians who lost their elected positions because they supported gun control--much more extreme than anyone would even dare to try to pass here. They said they did it because it was the right thing to do. Can you imagine that in this country? Elected officials acting as statesmen instead of wholly-owned subsidiaries of the gun cabal? Or any other group of generous contributors with special interests. I weep for our country.

  7. That 90% number never was accurate, and even the die hard pro gun control side admitted that it was FAR lower than that when the vote took place.

    Just because you feel you are on the moral high ground for supporting gun control, does not mean that you should post such drivel.

    The number never was 90% (even though they intentionally polled people in liberal, and high crime areas), and it was far lower than it's "high" (shortly after Newtown) when the vote took place.

    For the record, I actually support gun control.
    I just support actual common sense gun laws, and not "common sense" gun laws.
    What I mean here is that these proposed gun laws would make no difference.
    What would make a difference is to require anyone who wanted to own a pistol to have a license. Long guns are almost never used in suicide 2/3 of all gun deaths, and they are rarely used in crime.

    Pistols are the enemy. Require a license for pistol ownership, make the people pass a psyche and criminal check, and watch the gun deaths plummet!

    R. Fisher.

  8. *sigh* I guess I should have put the word "humor" in boldface...


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