Most of the best moments of my academic life were spent behind a podium with a clicker in one hand, a laser pointer in the other, and a slideshow behind me. I often found that the lecture could be enhanced by using a pithy aphorism in my talk or on a slide, either to emphasize a point or to lighten the mood. Over the decades I accumulated lots of these quotes, and today while searching for something else I found the old file. I searched the TYWKIWDBI aphorisms category to see if I've posted this list before, and found some other items that I'll repost below this, but here is the master list for you to peruse, enjoy, and perhaps share.
We must interpret a bad temper as the sign of an inferiority complex - Alfred Adler
The price of greatness is responsibility - Winston Churchill
Knowledge is of two kinds. We know a subject ourselves, or we know where we can find information upon it. - Samuel Johnson
“Muddy water, let stand, becomes clear.” - Lao Tzu
The traveler's-eye view of men and women is not satisfying. A man might spend his life in trains and restaurants and know nothing of humanity at the end. To know, one must be an actor as well as a spectator. - Aldous Huxley
Many ideas grow better when transplanted into another mind than in the one where they spring up. Oliver Wendell Holmes.
Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps. Lloyd George
Everyone desires long life, no one old age. Jonathan Swift.
The more you eat, the less flavor; the less you eat, the more flavor. Chinese proverb.
The peony, though large, is useless; the date blossom, though small, yields fruit. Chinese proverb.
It is that unoccupied space which makes a room habitable, as it is our leisure hours which make life endurable. Lin Yutang.
The right to be let alone is the most comprehensive of rights and the right most valued in civilized man. Louis D. Brandeis.
We trained hard -- but it seemed that every time we were beginning to form up into teams, we would be reorganized. I was to learn later in life that we tend to meet any new situation by reorganization, and a wonderful method it can be for creating the illusion of progress while producing confusion, inefficiency and demoralization. Petronius Aubiter.
The smallest actual good is better than the most magnificent promises of impossibilities. Thomas Macaulay.
He who forgives easily invites offense. Pierre Corneille.
Habit is either the best of servants or the worst of masters. Nathaniel Emmons.
To be always ready a man must be able to cut a knot, for everything cannot be untied.
I never got far until I stopped imagining I had to do everything myself. Frank W. Woolworth.
Never be a pioneer. It's the Early Christian that gets the fattest lion. H. H. Munro.
Any society that takes away from those most capable and gives to the least will perish. Abraham Lincoln.
Never press a point too hard because a deep wound is hard to heal and usually leaves a scar. Dale Carnegie.
Believe me, every man has his secret sorrows, which the world knows not; and oftentimes we call a man cold, when he is only sad. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
Beware of people with good intentions. Theodore Roosevelt.
I have also thought about calling a conference, since a conference is a gathering of important people, who, singly, can do nothing, but together can decide that nothing can be done. Fred Allen.
Friendship, like love, is destroyed by long absence, though it may be increased by short intermissions. Samuel Johnson.
If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. Chinese Proverb.
Whenever two hypotheses cover the facts, use the simpler of the two. William Ockham.
No soup is ever eaten as hot as it is cooked. German Proverb.
Fear not for the future; weep not for the past. Percy Bysshe Shelley.
When you are alone you are all your own. Leonardo DaVinci.
The art of statesmanship is to foresee the inevitable and to expedite its occurrence. Talleyrand.
I marvel at the aim of some sinners when given a stone. Annabel Battistella.
It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man by argument. William McAdoo
Whether the stone hits the pitcher, or the pitcher hits the stone, it's going to be bad for the pitcher. Miguel DeCervantes
I cannot give you a formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure - which is: Try to please everybody. Herbert Bayard Swope
The will to win is worthless if you do not have the will to prepare. Thane Yost
Faced with crisis, the man of character falls back on himself. Charles DeGaulle
I have to be wrong a certain number of times in order to be right a certain number of times. However, in order to be either, I must first make a decision. Frank N. Giampietro
Sin lies in hurting other people unnecessarily. All other "sins" are invented nonsense. Robert Heinlein.
The foolish and the dead alone never change their opinion. James Russell Lowell
When it was seen that many of the wicked seemed quite untroubled by evil consciences . . . then the idea of future suffering was advanced. (?Twain)
The true test of being comfortable with someone else is the ability to share silence. Frank Tyger
Fate laughs at probabilities. Edward Bulwer-Lytton
A pleasure is none the less a pleasure because it does not last forever. W. Somerset Maugham
Probably the happiest period in life is in middle age, when the eager passions of youth are cooled, and the infirmities of age not yet begun; as we see that the shadows, which are at morning and evening so large, almost entirely disappear at midday. Thomas Arnold.
There is a certain relief in change, even though it be from bad to worse; as I have found in traveling in a stage-coach, that it is often a comfort to shift one's position and be bruised in a new place. Washington Irving
Good judgment comes from experience, and experience - well that comes from poor judgment. Simon Bolivar Buckner
Make three correct guesses consecutively and you will establish a reputation as an expert. Laurence Peter.
Never underestimate the power of human stupidity. Robert Heinlein.
A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life. Charles Darwin.
The proper office of a friend is to side with you when you are in the wrong. Nearly everybody will side with you when you are in the right. Mark Twain.
We have no simple problems or easy decisions after kindergarten. John W. Turk.
Good luck beats early rising. Irish Proverb.
I love to make a mistake. It is my only assurance that I cannot reasonably be expected to assume the responsibility of omniscience. Rex Stout.
A day of worry is more exhausting than a day of work. John Lubbock.
The higher you climb on the mountain, the harder the wind blow. Sam Cummings.
It is great cleverness to know how to conceal one's cleverness. LaRochefoucauld.
The most valuable thing I have learned from life is to regret nothing. Somerset Maugham.
Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before. Mae West.
Any mental activity is easy if it need not take reality into account. Marcel Proust.
If all else fails, immortality can always be assured by spectacular error. John Kenneth Galbraith.
I never give them hell. I just tell the truth and they think it's hell. Harry Truman.
The reward for being a good problem solver is to be heaped with more and more difficult problems to solve. Buckminster Fuller.
Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper or your self-confidence. Robert Frost.
You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you. Walt Disney.
Nothing gives one person so much advantage over another as to remain always cool and unruffled under all circumstances. Thomas Jefferson.
The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it. Oscar Wilde.
We learn from experience. A man never wakes up his second baby just to see it smile. Grace Williams.
Start off every day with a smile and get it over with. W.C. Fields.
Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to do at that moment. Robert Benchley.
Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious. Brendan Gill.
I compare the troubles which we have to undergo in the course of a year to a great bundle of faggots, far too large for us to lift. But God does not require us to carry the whole at once. He mercifully unties the bundle and gives us first one stick, which we are to carry tomorrow, and so on. This we might easily manage, if we would only take the burden appointed for us each day; but we choose to increase our troubles by carrying yesterday's stick over again today, and adding tomorrow's burden to our load, before we are required to bear it. John Newton.
People who cannot find time for recreation are obliged sooner or later to find time for illness. John Wanamaker
We rest by changing the character of our work. Saunders Norvell.
No man is obliged to do as much as he can do. A man is to have part of his life to himself. Samuel Johnson.
All the animals except man know that the principal business of life is to enjoy it. Samuel Butler.
I have so much to do that I am going to bed. Savoyard Proverb.
The best cure for an off day is a day off. Frank Tyger.
The time to relax is when you don't have time for it. Sydney J. Harris.
Perpetual devotion to what a man calls his business is only to be sustained by perpetual neglect of many other things. And it is not by any means certain that a man's business is the most important thing he has to do. Robert Louis Stevenson.
The only purpose for which power can be rightfully exercised over any member of the community, against his will, is to prevent harm to others. His own good, whether physical or moral, is not sufficient warrant. Each person is the proper guardian of his own health, whether bodily or mental and spiritual. John Stuart Mill.
I never make the mistake of arguing with people for whose opinion I have no respect. Edward Gibbon.
Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present. Marcus Aurelius.
I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act. G.K. Chesterton.
Man can climb to the highest summits, but he cannot dwell there lone. George Bernard Shaw
We are most of us very lonely in this world; you who have any who love you, cling to them and thank God. William Makepeace Thackeray.
A ship should not ride on a single anchor, nor life on a single hope. Epictetus.
The more extensive a man's knowledge of what has been done, the greater will be his power of knowing what to do. Benjamin Disraeli.
Kites rise against, not with, the wind. No man ever worked his passage anywhere in a dead calm. Robert Herrick.
Touch a thistle timidly, and it pricks you; grasp it boldly, and its spines crumble. William S. Halsey.
The gem cannot be polished without friction, nor man perfected without trials. Confucius.
Where there is not wind, row. Portuguese Proverb.
When a true genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign, that the dunces are all in confederacy against him. Jonathan Swift.
Misfortunes are like knives, that either serve us or cut us, as we grasp them, by the blade or by the handle. James Russell Lowell.
A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is but saying in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday. Alexander Pope.
Originality is the art of concealing your source. Franklin P. Jones.
Enjoyment of the present is denied to those who worry too much about the future. William Feather.
There is no good in arguing with the inevitable. The only argument available with an east wind is to put on your overcoat. James Russell Lowell.
Not failure, but low aim is crime. James Russell Lowell.
Every animal revenges his pains upon those who happen to be near. Samuel Johnson.
Great spirits have always found violent opposition from mediocrities. Albert Einstein.
There are two ways to slide easily through life; to believe everything or to doubt everything. Both ways save us from thinking. Alfred Korzybski.
Every line of history inspires a confidence that we shall not go far wrong; that things mend. Ralph Waldo Emerson.
Command large fields, but cultivate small ones. Virgil.
He that wrestles with us, strengthens our nerves, and sharpens our skill. Our antagonist is our helper. Edmund Burke.
God gave us our memories so that we might have roses in December. James M. Barrie.
You can't do anything about the length of your life, but you can do something about its width and depth. H.L. Mencken.
Dig a well before you are thirsty. Chinese Proverb.
Unless a capacity for thinking be accompanied by a capacity for action, a superior mind exists in torture. Benedetto Croce.
Keep your fears to yourself, but share your courage with others. Robert Louis Stevenson.
Grant graciously what you dare not refuse. George Gallup.
Defeat never comes to any man until he admits it. Josephus Daniels.
Men who are unhappy, like men who sleep badly, are always proud of the fact. Bertrand Russell.
Skepticism is the highest of duties; blind faith the unpardonable sin. Thomas Huxley.
Business is always interfering with pleasure - but it makes other pleasures possible. William Feather.
Never give a man up until he has failed at something he likes. Lewis E. Lawes.
Our experience is composed rather of illusions lost than wisdom acquired. Joseph Roux.
You can't build a reputation on what you are going to do. Henry Ford.
Pray for a good harvest but keep on hoeing. Slovenian Proverb.
Finish each day and be done with it . . . You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities no doubt crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it well and serenely. Ralph Waldo Emerson.
A cigarette is the perfect type of a perfect pleasure. It is exquisite, and it leaves one unsatisfied. What more can one want? Oscar Wilde.
The most important thing I ever learned about management is that the work must be done by other men. Alfred P. Sloan.
Just be glad you're not getting all the government you're paying for. Will Rogers.
When a ;man decides to do something he must go all the way, but he must take responsibility for what he does. He must know first why he is doing it and then he must proceed with his actions with no doubts or remorse. Carlos Castenada.
A single breaker may recede; but the tide is evidently (?eventually?) coming in. Thomas Macaulay.
Results? Why, man, I have gotten a lot of results. I know several thousand things that won't work. Thomas Alva Edison.
The noblest works and foundations have proceeded from childless men. Francis Bacon.
To accuse others for one's misfortunes is a sign of want of education; to accuse oneself shows that one's education has begun; to accuse neither oneself nor others shows that one's education is complete. Epictetus.
The hottest places in Hell are reserved for those who, in a period of moral crisis, maintain their neutrality. Dante.
If you know how cowardly your enemy is, you would slap him. Bravery is the knowledge of the cowardice in the enemy. Ed Howe.
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing. Robert Benchley.
Don't jump on a man unless he's down. Finley Peter Dunne.
Be like the bird, who halting in his flight on limb too slight, yet sings - knowing he has wings. Victor Hugo.
All rising to a great place is by a winding stair. Francis Bacon.
Men do not trip over mountains, they trip over molehills. Confucius.
The eyes of other people are the eyes that ruin us. If all but myself were blind, I should want neither fine clothes, fine houses, nor furniture. Benjamin Franklin.
The mariner of old spoke thus to Neptune in a great tempest, "O God! Thou mayest save me if thou wilt, and if thou wilt thou mayest destroy me; but whether or not, I will steer my rudder true." Michel De Montaigne.
The average man, who does not know what to do with his life, wants another one which will last forever. Antole France.
Hidden talent counts for nothing. Nero.
Few things are harder to put up with than the annoyance of a good example. Mark Twain.
You do not get a man's most effective criticism until you provoke him. Severe truth is expressed with some bitterness. Henry David Thoreau.
There is nothing more fearful than imagination without taste. Goethe.
With three meals a day be content; take in your sail after a good run before the wind. Chinese Proverb.
A man who cannot tolerate small ills can never accomplish great things. Chinese Proverb
The heights by great men reached and kept were not attained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night. Henry Wadsworth Longfellow.
We often do good in order that we may do evil with impunity. La Rochefoucauld.
Many of our miseries are merely comparative; we are often made unhappy, not by the presence of any real evil, but by the absence of some fictitious good. Samuel Johnson.
Only a mediocre person is always at his best. Somerset Maugham.
It is more important to know where you are going than to get there quickly. Do not mistake activity for achievement. Mabel Newcomber.
You can't learn too soon that the most useful thing about a principle is that it can always be sacrificed to an expediency. Somerset Maugham.
The one serious conviction that a man should have is that nothing is to be taken too seriously. Samuel Butler.
One kind word can warm three winter months. Japanese Proverb.
Important principles may and must be flexible. Abraham Lincoln.
We should be careful to get out of an experience all the wisdom that is in it - not like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again - and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore. Mark Twain.
Knowledge is the antidote to fear. Ralph Waldo Emerson.
If 50 million people say a foolish thing, it is still a foolish thing. Anatole France.
A man is not old until regrets take the place of dreams. John Barrymore.
Even as we speak, jealous time flees - seize this day, and put little faith in tomorrow. Horace.
Poor is the pupil who does not surpass his master. Leonardo Da Vinci.
Men are by nature unequal. It is vain, therefore, to treat them as if they were equal. James A. Froude.
We should keep so close to facts that we never have to remember the second time what we said the first time. F. Marion Smith.
Truth can never be told so as to be understood and not be believed. William Blake.
What we call conscience is, in many instances, only a wholesome feat of the constable. Christian Bovee.
Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet. Kin Hubbard.
Life is too short to do anything for oneself that one can pay others to do for one. Somerset Maugham.
A good scare is worth more to a man than good advice. Ed Howe.
You may ask me for anything you like except time. Napoleon I.
Contradiction is not a sign of falsity, nor the lack of contradiction a sign of truth. Blaise Pascal.
Principles have no real force except when one is well fed. Mark Twain.
Life is occupied in both perpetuating itself and in surpassing itself; if all it does is maintain itself, then living is only not dying. Simone De Beauvoir.
One should absorb the color of life, but should never remember its details. Details are always vulgar. Oscar Wilde.
It's always easy to do the next step and it's always impossible to do two steps at a time. Seymour Cray.
I'm working to improve my methods, and every hour I save is an hour added to my life. Ayn Rand.
The great French Marshal Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener objected that the tree was slow-growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years. The marshal replied: "In that case, there is no time to lose, plant it this afternoon." John F. Kennedy.
There is no feeling in this world to be compared with self-reliance. Don't sacrifice that to anything else. John D. Rockefeller.
Never go out to meet trouble. If you will just sit still, nine times out of ten, someone will intercept it before it reaches you. Calvin Coolidge.
Everyone goes to the forest; some go for a walk to be inspired, and others go to cut down the trees. Vladimir Horowitz.
Of the best leaders, when their task is accomplished, the people all remark, "We have done it ourselves." Lao-Tzu.
The best cure for anger is delay. Seneca.
When angry, count ten before you speak; if very angry, 100. Thomas Jefferson.
Love is a delightful day's journey. At the farther end kiss your companion and say farewell. Ambrose Bierce.
You can't be envious and happy at the same time. Frank Tyger.
The moving finger writes; and having writ, moves on: nor all your piety nor wit shall lure it back to cancel half a line. Omar Khayyam.
Sorrow preys upon its solitude. The busy have no time for tears. Byron.
I must accept life unconditionally. Most people ask for happiness on condition. Happiness can only be felt if you don't set any condition. Artur Rubinstein.
Of all forms of caution, caution in love is perhaps the most fatal to true happiness. Bertrand Russell.
If a person gives you his time, he can give you no more precious gift. Frank Tyger.
Life is thickly sown with thorns, and I know no other remedy than to pass quickly through them. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us. Voltaire.
When you assemble a number of men to have the advantage of their joint wisdom, you inevitably assemble with those men all their prejudices, their passions, their errors of opinion, their local interests and their selfish views. Benjamin Franklin.
In looking back, I would say that happiness is 90% anticipation. William Feather.
Take spring when it comes, and rejoice. Take happiness when it comes, and rejoice. Take love when it comes, and rejoice. Carl Ewald.
It is misery enough to have once been happy. John Clarke.
Nothing would be done at all if a man waited till he could do it so well that no one could find fault with it. John Henry Newman.
The language of excitement is at best picturesque merely. You must be calm before you can utter oracles. Henry David Thoreau.
The successful man lengthens his stride when he discovers that the signpost has deceived him; the failure looks for a place to sit down. J. R. Rogers.
Who enters my house as a friend will never be too early, always too late. Flemish Proverb.
By working faithfully eight hours a day, you may eventually get to be a boss and work twelve hours a day. Robert Frost.
Re ICU care:
Why so large a cost, having so short a lease,
Dost thou upon thy failing mansion spend.
-- Shakespeare, Sonnet 146
Vex not his ghost; O, let him pass!
He hates him
That would upon the rack of this tough world
Stretch him out longer
-- Shakespeare, Lear
"I mean, when it comes to meticulous studies of longevity, I say what the hell, you're a long time dead. Even if your BMI is 23." (quote from Punch column, 1980s).
"The young man knows the rules, but the old man knows the exceptions. . . The young man feels uneasy if he is not doing something to stir up this patient's internal arrangements. The old man takes things more quietly and is much more willing to let things well alone." -- Oliver Wendell Holmes, "The Young Practitioner" in Medical Essays, Houghton-Mifflin, New York, 1892.
“Only a fool tests the depth of the water with both feet.” - African proverb
Nothing in fine print is ever good news - anonymous
Perhaps middle age is, or should be, a period of shedding shells; the shell of ambition, of material accumulations and possessions, the shell of ego - Anne Morrow Lindbergh
Judge: a law student who marks his own examination papers. - H.L. Mencken
When I was 40, my doctor advised me that a man in his forties shouldn’t play tennis. I heeded his advice carefully and could hardly wait until I reached 50 to start again - Justice Hugo L. Black
Sometimes I get the feeling the whole world is against me, but deep down I know that’s not true. Some smaller countries are neutral. - Robert Orben
It ain’t braggin’ if you can do it. - Dizzy Dean
In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. - Thomas Jefferson
You’re only young once, but you can be immature forever. - Anonymous
Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever. - Napoleon
There is a time for departure even when there’s no certain place to go. - Tennessee Williams
The difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets. - Will Rogers
Do... or do not. There is no try. - Yoda
“. . . trifles light as air are to the jealous confirmation strong as proof of holy writ.” in Othello, Shakespeare/DeVere [re using fragments of evidence to support a hypothesis, cited by John Repine at Aspen Lung Conference, 1982.]
“Consider your verdict,” the King said to the jury.
“Not yet, not yet!” the Rabbit hastily interrupted. “There’s a great deal to come before that.”
“Call the first witness,” said the King.
-- Alice in Wonderland
