11 September 2013


Duncan Green, a strategic adviser for Oxfam who posted it online, described it as "a handy guide for our fellow Europeans and others trying to fathom weaselly Brit-speak". Mr Green said: "Sadly, I didn’t write it. It’s just one of those great things that is being passed around on the internet."

Although the author of the table is unconfirmed, it is thought it may have originally been drawn up by a Dutch company as an attempt to help employees working in the UK. 
Via The Telegraph.


  1. I think Churchill put it best when he said, addressing Parliament, "This is precisely the sort of nonsense up with which I refuse to put."

    1. Relevant:


  2. I've worked with Brits for years now, and most of these have started to sink in. The dinner thing still somehow gets me as it's directly against what I'm used to as a Finn. If you say "let's do lunch" I will take that as a direct invitation and prepare for it. And well have the lunch at 11AM like it's supposed to :)

  3. Oh! Hey! C'mon Jimmy!
    Thems no Brits, thems English!
    Ye widnae get a Scot snivelling like that.
    Aw weel, awricht, ye widnae catch him sae easy.
    Peely wally teuchters as they are but!

    And as for yer twa wurds security..42 is aready twa wurds afore we get to ian none which is twa wurds too!
    Can ye no count laddie.

  4. The excellent "Johnson" blog at The Economist has an entry based on the same list:


  5. Genetic memory must run deep. I understood these perfectly.

  6. Well, I am British and this is the best laugh I have had for some time. Reminds me of when I used to write the old style school reports. :-)


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...