25 January 2021

Humor for English majors

Queen Elizabeth was visiting sick children in a Scottish hospital, and after performing her planned duties, she wandered off to other parts of the hospital. Walking into an unidentified ward, she went up to a patient in bed and asked him how he was doing. He replied:
"O, my luve is like a red, red rose,
That's newly sprung in June.
O, my luve is like the melodie,
That's sweetly played in tune....."
Finding the response somewhat inappropriate she wished him good day and moved down the ward to a room where another man was sitting quietly. In response to her inquiry, he began singing:
"Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to min' ?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And days o' lang syne ?"
Somewhat baffled by this sequence of events she found a third room, where her greeting was met with:
"Wee, sleekit, cowrin', tim'rous beastie,
O, what a panic's in thy breastie ...."
She gave up, and left the ward. On her way out, she encountered the head nurse. "Is this the psychiatric ward?" she asked.

"No, your majesty," the nurse replied. "It's......the Burns unit."
Reposted because I just discovered that January 25 is Burns Night.


  1. True made-up fact:

    Robert Frost's poem "Fire and Ice" was the opening salvo in an epic rap battle with Robert Burns.

  2. This post just made my day. Thank you.

  3. Terrible puns are the best puns. And literary terrible puns are even better!

  4. It wouldn't have been such a loss had the set up been short. Alas, I read...then I read on...then on and on...then on and on and on...only for the payoff of a...of a...PUN?

    Unfortunately, you realize that the penalty is death. And that is way too good fer ye! If Robert Burns, then surely you must too!

  5. This is excellent wordplay -- not a bad pun -- there's a difference. : )


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...