Deviant duck dicks

"As part of the Ig Nobel Prize Ceremony, four of the world’s great thinkers were invited to give 24/7 Lectures. Each 24/7 Lecture was on an assigned topic. The lecturer was asked to explain that topic twice:

FIRST, a complete technical description in TWENTY-FOUR (24) SECONDS; and THEN a clear summary that anyone could understand in SEVEN (7) WORDS."

Here's one example:

Lecturer: Patty Brennan (Evolutionary Biologist and Behavioral Ecologist, specializing in the morphological evolution of reproductive structures)

Complete technical description in TWENTY-FOUR (24) SECONDS:

“In many species of ducks, males often fail to attract a mate, so they resort to forcing copulations on females. Males can sexually force females because their penis functions with an explosive eversion mechanism that quickly and forcefully inseminates females despite their resistance. Females, however, have co-evolved vaginas with dead ends and spirals that prevent full penis eversion when she is not receptive.” [Time called by the Referee]

Clear summary that anyone can understand, in SEVEN (7) WORDS:
          “Deviant duck dicks foiled by fabulous vaginas.”

The other three (clock genes, time, fluid dynamics) are posted at Neatorama.